Things I know for sure
Jimmy Carter is still the worst person in America.
Ehud Olmert is still the Prime Minister of Israel (though thankfully, not for long).
The View is still the worst show on television (but Elisabeth Hasselback rocks).
Hillary Clinton still has no chance to beat Barack Obama.
When the time comes, most people will not vote for Obama in the general election.
Chris Matthews and Keith Olbermann still have jobs they don't deserve.
No team can win a World Series with A-Rod in their lineup.
Mark Cuban made a mistake in letting Avery Johnson go.
The honeymoon is over for the Dallas Stars.
Charles Krauthammer and Thomas Sowell are the best columnists in the business.
Gas prices will average over $5 a gallon within a year.
No matter who wins the election, gas prices will continue to rise.
Iran will have the bomb.
Somewhere, a prominent Democrat will blame George Bush for the disaster in Myanmar.
More illegal immigrants will demand more rights.
More Democrats will give it to them, over the objection of legal immigrants.
Having to cut down your trips to the casino resort to 4 times a year from 6 isn't really making the ultimate sacrifice.
Michelle Obama makes me cringes - and her race has nothing to do with it.
Joy Behar gives me the same reaction.
So does Rosie O'Donnell and Roseanne Barr.
Why hasn't Al Gore received more blame for the food shortages that are caused by ethanol production?
Now that April was the 11th coldest in 125 years, can we finally agree that there is no man-made global warming?
Since we only discovered the ozone layer in the last few decades, how do we know there wasn't always a hole at the North Pole?
Did CBS doctor the picture, or are there really penguins in the North Pole?
You will never convince a trufer (someone who believes 9/11 was an inside job) that he's crazy. So don't even bother. Just walk away from him. If you linger to close for to long, you may catch what he has.
To end this on a more enjoyable note, enjoy this picture (courtesy of Pixdaus:)
4 comments:
It's such a shame you didn't number your "things"...'twould have made them so much easier to respond to!
OK...let's do it the hard way:
Jimmy Carter is still the worst person in America.
Jimmy Carter simply can’t be the worst person in America as long as George W. Bush remains in the country.
Ehud Olmert is still the Prime Minister of Israel (though thankfully, not for long).
Can’t argue that Olmert is still Israel’s PM.
The View is still the worst show on television (but Elisabeth Hasselback rocks).
Can’t comment with authority on this point, but I did watch 10 minutes of “Dancing with the Stars” on a business trip last year, and I cannot fathom anything worse.
Hillary Clinton still has no chance to beat Barack Obama.
Not in the race to become the Democratic Party nominee for President in 2008. She might be able to take him in a well-proctored game of “Risk”.
When the time comes, most people will not vote for Obama in the general election.
Is this to say that the majority of those people who vote will not vote for Obama (and thus, McCain will be 44)? Or that the majority of US citizens in general will not vote for him? Strengthen your statement, Shayne.
Next comment...
Chris Matthews and Keith Olbermann still have jobs they don't deserve.
Heh. Like a great many people holding down white-collar jobs these days.
No team can win a World Series with A-Rod in their lineup.
Well, if A-Rod is going to continue to play for the Yankees until the end of his career, I certainly hope you are right.
Mark Cuban made a mistake in letting Avery Johnson go.
Agreed.
The honeymoon is over for the Dallas Stars.
NHL Hockey? Does anyone still watch that, or care?
Charles Krauthammer and Thomas Sowell are the best columnists in the business.
Sure are…though not in the business you are probably referring to. Nobody handles shovels or spreads it (of the ‘sh’ type) around quite as well as those two, though, that’s for sure.
Gas prices will average over $5 a gallon within a year.
Man, I hope you are right about that…might get more folks onto the trains and buses and off the roads, and perhaps even drive technological innovation that will someday result in true progress.
No matter who wins the election, gas prices will continue to rise.
Agreed. The only gas the U.S. President has any control over is that which they spew themselves and via their administrations (and the current Bush Administration isn’t having any trouble pissing it all over all 300 million of us…even after 8 years!).
And finally...
Iran will have the bomb.
Somehow, some way, some day…it is inevitable that Iran will have the bomb. As will many, many others.
Somewhere, a prominent Democrat will blame George Bush for the disaster in Myanmar.
At this point, it is far more likely that some prominent REPUBLICAN will lay the blame for Myanmar and whatever-else at GWB’s feet.
More illegal immigrants will demand more rights.
Give a mouse a cookie, he’ll ask for a glass of milk.
More Democrats will give it to them, over the objection of legal immigrants.
More cookies, more milk. And both are being doled out by politicos on both sides of the aisle.
Having to cut down your trips to the casino resort to 4 times a year from 6 isn't really making the ultimate sacrifice.
I have no context for this comment, and thus no response.
Michelle Obama makes me cringes - and her race has nothing to do with it.
No, I am sure her race has nothing to do with your aversion to Ms. Obama…but could it be her skin color?
Joy Behar gives me the same reaction.
Who is Joy Behar?
So does Rosie O'Donnell and Roseanne Barr.
So you have no interest in sleeping with large, funny brunettes?
Why hasn't Al Gore received more blame for the food shortages that are caused by ethanol production?
I would say, “Perhaps because Al doesn’t produce any of the nasty stuff himself?”, but I am still trying to work out the food shortages part. In the US?
Now that April was the 11th coldest in 125 years, can we finally agree that there is no man-made global warming?
You head-in-the-sanders absolutely kill me. First you say that the basis for global warming theory is based on statistical anomalies (albeit ones that stack up so high that they simply must be considered statistically significant), and now you want to use just such an anomaly to explain global warming away? AMAZING!
Since we only discovered the ozone layer in the last few decades, how do we know there wasn't always a hole at the North Pole?
D-uh. Because when Ozone and the so-called Ozone Layer was first revealed by science there was no hole at the North Pole and now there is.
Did CBS doctor the picture, or are there really penguins in the North Pole?
Don’t know the picture to which you refer, but if there are penguins in it and it is truly the North Pole, then you win the doctoring accusation.
You will never convince a trufer (someone who believes 9/11 was an inside job) that he's crazy. So don't even bother. Just walk away from him. If you linger to close for to long, you may catch what he has.
Agreed, but you have to admit…those nuts provide an awfully interesting and intriguing way to kill time.
To end this on a more enjoyable note, enjoy this picture (courtesy of Pixdaus:)
Nice picture.
great list indeed!
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